Get answers to the most common questions about Social Stories from parents, educators, speech-language pathologists (SLPs), and caregivers around the world. These evidence-based answers will help you understand and use Social Stories effectively.
1. Are Social Stories just for autism?
No, Social Stories are not exclusively for autism. While Social Stories were originally developed by Carol Gray in 1991 for children with autism spectrum disorder (ASD), they are effective for all children who benefit from structured, visual learning approaches.
Social Stories help:
- Typically developing children learning new skills
- Children with ADHD who need clear behavioral expectations
- Children with anxiety disorders navigating stressful situations
- Children with speech and language delays
- Children with sensory processing challenges
- Children with intellectual disabilities
- Any child facing behavioral challenges like hitting, sharing difficulties, or separation anxiety
Parents, teachers, and therapists use social scripts successfully with neurotypical children. The structured format works well for visual learners of all neurotypes.
2. What are the three parts of a Social Story?
The three main parts of a Social Story are:
1. Descriptive Sentences
These describe the situation, setting, and people involved objectively.
Example: “Sometimes I feel angry when I can’t have what I want.”
2. Perspective Sentences
These describe feelings, thoughts, and reactions of others to help develop empathy and theory of mind.
Example: “When I hit, it hurts people’s bodies and makes them sad.”
3. Directive Sentences
These suggest appropriate responses and behaviors the child can use.
Example: “I can use my words to say ‘I’m angry'” or “I can ask an adult for help when I’m frustrated.”
Important ratio
Effective social narratives include 0-1 directive sentences for every 2-5 descriptive/perspective sentences. This ensures the story teaches understanding rather than just giving commands.
Additional sentence types include:
- Affirmative sentences: Reinforce positive outcomes
- Coaching sentences: Offer specific strategies
- Control sentences: Help the child remember the story
3. What are Social Stories called now?
Social Stories are still called “Social Stories” as the official term, which is trademarked by Carol Gray, the creator.
However, similar tools may be called:
- Social narratives
- Social scripts
- Social Stories™
- Social learning stories
- Visual supports
- Social situations stories
- Behavior stories
In educational settings across the UK, US, Canada, and Australia, the term “Social Story” remains the most widely recognized and searched term by parents, special education teachers, speech-language pathologists (SLPs), occupational therapists (OTs), and behavior specialists.
Regardless of terminology, these tools follow the same evidence-based structure: describing social situations, explaining expected behaviors, and teaching perspective-taking through simple, child-friendly language.
4. What is a Social Story example?
Here’s a complete social script example for handwashing:
“Washing My Hands”
Sometimes my hands get dirty when I play, eat, or use the bathroom.
Germs are tiny things I can’t see that can make me sick.
Washing my hands with soap and water helps remove germs.
When I wash my hands, I:
- Turn on the water
- Wet my hands
- Use soap
- Scrub for 20 seconds (I can sing “Happy Birthday”)
- Rinse off all the soap
- Dry my hands with a towel
Clean hands keep me healthy and stop germs from spreading to my family and friends.
Adults are happy when I remember to wash my hands.
I am learning to wash my hands all by myself!
Why this example works:
- Describes the situation (dirty hands)
- Explains why it matters (germs and health)
- Provides clear, sequential steps
- Includes perspective sentences (how others feel)
- Ends with affirmation and encouragement
Personalization tip: Add the child’s name and photos of them performing each step for greater effectiveness. Teachers and SLPs often create laminated versions with Velcro-attached photos.
5. What is the definition of a Social Story?
A social story is a short, personalized narrative that describes a social situation, skill, or concept in a structured, supportive format to help children understand and navigate social expectations.
Developed by Carol Gray in 1991, Social Stories use specific sentence types and a gentle tone to explain:
- What happens in particular situations
- Why things happen
- How people feel and react
- What the child can do
Key Characteristics:
- Written from the child’s perspective in first or third person
- Uses positive and patient language
- Appropriate to the child’s developmental level
- Includes visual supports when helpful
- Read regularly during calm moments, not as punishment
Purpose of social scripts:
- Build social understanding and awareness
- Reduce anxiety about new or challenging situations
- Teach replacement behaviors for challenging actions
- Develop theory of mind and empathy
- Provide predictable frameworks for confusing social scenarios
Evidence-based research shows social narratives are particularly effective for children with autism, ADHD, anxiety, and other learning differences, though beneficial for all children learning social-emotional skills.
6. What are the rules for Social Stories?
The official rules for Social Stories, established by Carol Gray, include:
1. Sentence Type Ratio
Use 0-1 directive sentences for every 2-5 descriptive, perspective, affirmative, cooperative, or control sentences. This ensures stories teach understanding, not just commands.
2. Child’s Perspective
Write from the child’s point of view using first-person (“I”) or third-person (“Jamie”) language, not adult commands.
3. Positive, Patient Tone
Keep the tone supportive and encouraging rather than commanding, negative, or punitive. Focus on what TO do, not just what NOT to do.
4. Appropriate Language Level
Match vocabulary and sentence length to the child’s developmental level and comprehension ability.
5. Literal and Accurate
Use concrete, literal descriptions. Avoid assumptions, idioms, sarcasm, or figurative language that may confuse autistic or neurodivergent children.
6. Include Perspective
Add perspective sentences to develop theory of mind by explaining how others think and feel.
7. Answer Relevant Questions
Address “wh” questions (who, what, when, where, why) relevant to the situation.
8. Keep It Brief
Typical length: 3-10 sentences for young children, longer for older children and complex situations.
9. Add Visual Supports
Include photos, illustrations, or symbols to enhance understanding, especially for visual learners.
10. Review When Calm
Read stories regularly during calm moments as teaching tools, NOT as punishment or consequences during challenging behavior.
Professional tip: Speech-language pathologists and special education teachers often work with families to ensure social stories follow these guidelines for maximum effectiveness.
7. What is a social script for neurodivergent children?
For neurodivergent children, a social narrative is a specialized teaching tool that makes implicit social rules and expectations explicit through structured, concrete language and visual supports.
Understanding Neurodivergence
Neurodivergent children—including those with autism, ADHD, dyslexia, dyspraxia, sensory processing disorder, or other neurological differences—often think and process information differently than neurotypical peers.
How social narratives Help Neurodivergent Children:
- Break down complexity: Transform complex social situations into clear, sequential steps
- Teach the “hidden curriculum”: Explain unwritten social rules that neurotypical children absorb naturally but neurodivergent children may miss
- Reduce anxiety: Prepare children for unpredictable situations through advance explanation
- Develop perspective-taking: Explicitly teach recognition of others’ emotions and thoughts
- Provide concrete strategies: Turn abstract concepts like “be kind” or “calm down” into specific actions
- Honor literal thinking: Avoid idioms, sarcasm, and ambiguous language that can confuse
- Respect processing differences: Allow children to review stories at their own pace
- Build independence: Increase confidence and autonomy in social situations
Examples of social scripts for Neurodivergent Needs:
- Explaining sensory experiences (why the fire alarm is loud)
- Teaching executive function skills (how to start homework)
- Managing transitions and changes in routine
- Understanding nonverbal communication cues
- Navigating overwhelming environments (shopping centers, assemblies)
Professional use: Speech-language pathologists, occupational therapists, special education teachers, and autism specialists worldwide use social narratives as evidence-based interventions that respect neurodivergent learning styles while teaching essential life skills.
8. What are autistic meltdowns?
Autistic meltdowns are intense responses to overwhelming sensory, emotional, or cognitive overload – not tantrums or intentional misbehavior.
What Causes Meltdowns?
A meltdown occurs when an autistic person’s nervous system becomes so overwhelmed that they temporarily lose control of their behavior and emotional regulation.
Common triggers include:
- Sensory overload (loud noises, bright lights, strong smells, uncomfortable clothing textures)
- Emotional stress or anxiety
- Unexpected changes in routine
- Communication frustration (unable to express needs)
- Social demands exceeding capacity
- Accumulation of small stressors throughout the day
- Physical discomfort (hunger, pain, fatigue)
What Happens During a Meltdown?
The person may:
- Cry uncontrollably
- Scream or make loud vocalizations
- Hit, kick, or throw objects
- Withdraw completely and shut down
- Experience difficulty communicating
- Engage in self-injurious behavior
- Seem unable to hear or process instructions
Meltdowns vs. Tantrums: Key Differences
| Meltdown | Tantrum |
|---|---|
| Involuntary neurological response | Goal-oriented behavior |
| Caused by genuine overwhelm | Seeking attention or desired outcome |
| Cannot be “stopped” on command | Stops when goal achieved or ignored |
| Person has lost control | Person maintains some control |
How to Support During a Meltdown:
- Ensure physical safety for the person and others
- Reduce sensory input (dim lights, lower noise, create space)
- Provide time to recover without demands or pressure
- Avoid punishment—meltdowns are not misbehavior
- Stay calm and quiet yourself
- Respect communication differences—they may not be able to talk
- Identify triggers afterward to prevent future meltdowns
How social narratives help prevent meltdowns:
Social stories can help autistic children:
- Recognize early warning signs of overwhelm
- Develop coping strategies before reaching crisis
- Understand what meltdowns are and that they’re not “bad”
- Learn to communicate needs before overwhelm occurs
- Practice calming strategies during calm moments
Important note: Social scripts are teaching tools for calm moments, not interventions to use during a meltdown.
9. What are lesser-known symptoms of high-functioning autism?
Note: “High-functioning autism” is an outdated term. Current diagnostic language uses “Autism Level 1” or “autism without intellectual disability.”
Lesser-known symptoms often missed in diagnosis include:
1. Executive Function Challenges
Difficulty with organization, time management, planning, and task initiation despite high intelligence. May struggle to start tasks, manage multiple steps, or estimate time needed.
2. Alexithymia
Difficulty identifying and describing one’s own emotions. May know something feels “off” but cannot name the feeling as anger, sadness, or anxiety.
3. Interoception Differences
Not recognizing internal body signals like hunger, thirst, pain, need to use the bathroom, or illness until they become extreme.
4. Prosopagnosia (Face Blindness)
Difficulty recognizing familiar faces, relying instead on voice, clothing, hairstyle, or context clues to identify people.
5. Monotropic Thinking
Intense, narrow focus on interests or tasks, making multitasking or task-switching mentally exhausting.
6. Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)
Anxiety-driven resistance to requests and expectations, even enjoyable activities, due to need for autonomy and control.
7. Echolalia
Repeating phrases from media, past conversations, or internal scripts for communication or self-regulation (not just “parroting”).
8. Hyperlexia
Reading ability far exceeding comprehension level, especially in young children who can decode words but struggle with meaning.
9. Gestalt Language Processing
Learning language in chunks, phrases, or scripts rather than single words, then gradually breaking them down.
10. Sensory Seeking Behaviors
Craving intense sensory input like spinning, jumping, pressure, or specific textures to regulate the nervous system.
11. Social Exhaustion
Needing significant recovery time after social interactions, even positive ones, due to the effort of processing social information and masking.
12. Masking
Consciously or unconsciously hiding autistic traits to fit in, leading to burnout, anxiety, depression, and late diagnosis—especially common in girls and women.
13. Context Blindness
Difficulty using context to interpret ambiguous information, leading to literal interpretations or confusion in social situations.
14. Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)
Intense emotional response to perceived or actual rejection, criticism, or failure, often co-occurring with autism and ADHD.
Why These Symptoms Are Missed:
- Not included in traditional diagnostic criteria focused on observable behaviors
- More common in girls and women who mask effectively
- Overlooked in BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color) individuals due to diagnostic bias
- Hidden by strong verbal abilities or academic success
- Attributed to other conditions like anxiety, ADHD, or “just being shy”
How social narratives Can Help:
Social scripts can address many lesser-known autism symptoms by:
- Teaching interoception awareness (“My Hungry Body” story)
- Explaining executive function steps (“How to Start Homework”)
- Building emotional vocabulary for alexithymia
- Validating masking exhaustion and need for breaks
- Providing concrete strategies for abstract social rules
- Reducing anxiety about demand avoidance triggers
Alternative Social Script Examples
explore our guides on sharing and turn-taking, gentle hands and managing hitting, bath time routines, hair washing, and other everyday self-care skills. Each script follows the same calm, structured approach—helping children understand expectations, practice replacement language, and build emotional regulation across home, school, and community settings.
- Social Narrative for Bath Time and Showering
- Social Script for Hitting and Gentle Hands
- Social Narrative for Sharing and Turn-Taking
- Social Script for Hair Washing
Disclaimer
This website is an independent educational resource and is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or sponsored by Carol Gray or The Gray Center for Social Learning and Understanding. “Social Stories™” and “Social Story™” are trademarks of Carol Gray. All references to Social Stories are used for educational and informational purposes only. We acknowledge Carol Gray as the creator of the Social Stories™ methodology. For official information and resources, please visit carolgraysocialstories.com.
